Togetherness
"We just grew apart."
I'm sure you've heard someone say that statement. Maybe you've said it yourself.
Growing apart is not God's design in marriage. The foundations that God gives us in marriage are choices. The second foundation is a choice too. It is the choice to...
Have an inseperable togetherness.
Togetherness is the first statement that we see about marriage.
"A man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24).
Jesus seconded that togetherness was a foundation of marriage.
He [Jesus] answered, "Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, 'Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate" (Matthew 19:4-6).
It was right after this statement, his disciples were amazed and said, "If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry."
If togetherness just happens, then there would be no reason to think that it would be better for two to remain two instead of becoming one. Togetherness is work. The physical act of sex is the symbol of togetherness and sex is easy. Two becoming one is a daily conscience decision that both people have to make. For sex to be the climax of two lives becoming one, the decision for togetherness must be made.
God has and is bringing you together as one. No one can tear this apart, not even you. If you try, it will be like tearing apart two pieces of paper that are glued together. It is messy and hurts the paper.
Husbands, when you come home, do you permanently dwell in your "man cave?" You can dwell in your man cave without having a man cave. You can check out behind the paper, TV, hobby or internet. Sure, we need our down time. But our spouses and families need us to engage.
Wives, do you allow the daily necessities of running a family to shield you from building unity with your husband? Yes, laundry needs to be washed, meals need to be cooked, butts need to be wiped, but these cannot be the wall in which we hide behind to disengage from our husbands.
What are you doing in your marriage to build unity?
How much time do you spend talking together?
When you talk to others about your spouse, are you building them up or tearing them down?
Do you pray for and with your spouse?
As you take care of specific tasks that is required in your home (laundry, meals, finances, etc), do you seek ways to accomplish more together than as one?
In Real Life...
What is one thing that you can do (that you are not doing now) that will build your unity?
, I wanted to give overviews of the three sessions I go through. I don't really remember how it all came about in my mind, but I've landed on three concepts that are foundational to marriage. These are not my ideas, but three core components that God gave us.
